Fae Pronoun

In my classroom, I’ve noticed something interesting: my students increasingly ask about pronouns beyond the traditional he, she, and they. One of the neopronouns that comes up most often is fae 🔊 🎤. Even advanced English learners sometimes feel uncertain about how to use fae pronouns respectfully and correctly. The truth is, understanding fae pronouns isn’t complicated — it just requires learning one straightforward pronoun set and practicing it the same way you’d practice any new grammar.

I’ll walk you through exactly what fae pronouns are, how they’re used in sentences, where they come from, and most importantly, how to use them confidently to show respect for everyone’s gender identity. By the end, you’ll have the tools to recognize fae pronouns and use them without hesitation.

What Are Fae Pronouns?

Fae pronouns are a complete pronoun set designed to be gender-neutral. They work exactly like the traditional he/him and she/her patterns, which means they follow the same grammatical rules you already know. Someone who uses fae pronouns is asking you to refer to them using fae instead of he or she.

Example 1: “Fae went to the store to pick up some groceries.” (Fae is the subject.)

Example 2: “I met Alex today, and I really enjoyed talking with faer.” (Faer is the object.)

Example 3: “This is fae’s favorite restaurant.” (Fae’s shows possession.)

The key difference between fae pronouns and traditional pronouns is simply the sound: instead of “he” or “she,” the base is “fae.” Once you understand this one substitution, you can use all five forms correctly.

The Complete Fae Pronoun Paradigm

Case	Form	Function	Example
Subject	Fae	Fae is the subject of the verb	Fae is a talented musician.
Object	Faer	Faer receives the action	I gave faer the book.
Possessive Adjective	Faer	Faer modifies a noun (shows ownership)	Faer car is parked outside.
Possessive Pronoun	Faers	Faers stands alone (the thing itself is owned)	This backpack is faers.
Reflexive	Faerself	Fae refers back to the subject	Fae taught faerself to code.

Common Mistakes with Fae Pronouns

✗ Incorrect: “I gave him — I mean, fae — the homework.”

✓ Correct: “I gave faer the homework.”

Why: Faer is the object form. “Him” is also an object form, so if you remember that faer equals him structurally, you’ll use the right form.

✗ Incorrect: “Fae lost faer’s phone again.”

✓ Correct: “Fae lost fae’s phone again.”

Why: The possessive adjective form is faer, not “fae’s.” Although “fae’s” might sound natural because of he’s/she’s, fae pronouns don’t use the apostrophe form.

✗ Incorrect: “My friend uses fae pronouns, but I always forget and say they instead.”

✓ Correct: “My friend uses fae pronouns, and I practice using faer correctly out of respect.”

Why: While they/them is gender-neutral, if someone has specifically told you they use fae, they’re trusting you with their identity. Using their pronouns, even if it feels unfamiliar at first, shows you care.

✗ Incorrect: “Fae and faer decided to go on vacation together.”

✓ Correct: “Fae and faer friend decided to go on vacation together.”

Why: Faer is an object or possessive form, not a subject form. When you’re introducing who did something with fae, use a specific name or noun with faer, not faer alone as the subject.

Origins and Context of Fae Pronouns

Fae pronouns emerged in the 2010s from online communities on Tumblr and Twitter, created by non-binary and genderqueer individuals seeking pronouns that felt more authentic to their identities. The term is believed to derive from “fairy,” a word often associated with non-binary and gender-nonconforming identities in queer communities.

It’s important to note that fae pronouns are part of a broader movement toward neopronouns — pronouns that don’t fit the traditional binary he/she system. Other examples include xe/xem, ze/hir, and ey/em. Each neopronoun set reflects the personal identity and preferences of the people who use them.

Example: “When I started using fae pronouns online, I felt more seen and valued by my community.”

Using Fae Pronouns in Different Contexts

In Everyday Conversation

The most important rule is to use fae pronouns the same way you use any other pronouns: naturally and consistently. If someone tells you “I use fae/faer/faers,” you simply remember that pattern and apply it whenever you refer to them.

Example 1: “Have you met my roommate? Fae’s studying engineering.”

Example 2: “I’m excited to see faer at the coffee shop tomorrow.”

Example 3: “Faerself has won three awards for public speaking.”

In Professional Writing

In professional contexts—emails, reports, academic papers—fae pronouns should be used just as formally and respectfully as any other pronouns. If your organization or publication has style guidelines about pronouns, follow them. Many companies now include a pronouns field in employee profiles specifically to make this easier.

Example: “This proposal was created by Dr. Jordan, who brings faer expertise in environmental science to every project.”

In Literature and Fiction

Fae pronouns appear increasingly in young adult literature, fantasy, and speculative fiction as authors represent non-binary and genderqueer characters. Using fae pronouns for a character signals to readers that this character’s identity is important to the story.

Example: “The protagonist discovered that fae’s mentor had been hiding a crucial secret all along.”

Fae vs. Other Gender-Neutral Pronouns: A Comparison

Pronoun Set	Subject	Object	Possessive	Reflexive	Common Usage
Fae	Fae	Faer	Faer/Faers	Faerself	Whimsical, associated with fairy aesthetics
They	They	Them	Their/Theirs	Themselves	Most widely recognized, grammatically neutral
Xe	Xe	Xem	Xeir/Xeirs	Xemself	Linguistic innovation, formal settings
Ze	Ze	Hir	Hir/Hirs	Hirself	Academic circles, older neopronoun usage

Sample Dialogue: Using Fae Pronouns in Conversation

Quick Quiz: Testing Your Fae Pronoun Knowledge

Practical Tips for Respecting Fae Pronouns

Using someone’s pronouns is fundamentally about respect and inclusion. Here are practical steps to follow:

Ask respectfully: If you’re unsure about someone’s pronouns, ask in a straightforward way: “What pronouns do you use?” This is far better than guessing or avoiding the issue.

Practice mentally: When you learn someone uses fae pronouns, say a few sentences to yourself using the correct forms. Mental rehearsal helps cement the pattern.

Correct yourself calmly: If you slip up and use the wrong pronoun, simply correct yourself without over-apologizing. “I gave the report to faer” is cleaner than “Oh gosh, I’m so sorry, I meant to say faer, not him.” A brief, natural correction shows respect without drawing attention to the mistake.

Advocate gently: If you hear someone else use the wrong pronouns for your friend, you can say, “Actually, fae uses fae pronouns,” in a low-key tone. This helps normalize corrections and reinforces the importance of getting pronouns right.

Remember: fae pronouns are not a phase — they’re part of how someone expresses their identity. Treat them with the same permanence and respect you’d give to anyone’s name.

Common Misconceptions About Fae Pronouns

Misconception 1: “Fae pronouns are only used by non-binary people.”

Reality: While many non-binary individuals use fae pronouns, anyone can choose to use them. Some cisgender people also prefer fae pronouns for personal or aesthetic reasons.

Misconception 2: “If I forget to use fae pronouns, I’m a bad person.”

Reality: Mistakes happen. What matters is that you make a genuine effort and correct yourself when you slip up. Everyone learns gradually.

Misconception 3: “Fae pronouns will never be ‘real’ grammar.”

Reality: Language evolves based on how people use it. Pronouns like they/them were once considered only plural; now they’re widely accepted as singular too. Fae and other neopronouns are already part of English, especially among younger speakers.

Related Articles

• ↑ Master Pillar: English Grammar
• They/Them Pronouns: Complete Guide to Singular They — the most common gender-neutral pronoun set
• Mastering Male Pronouns: He/Him/His and Respect
• Avoiding Vague Pronouns: Clarity in Writing
• ↑ Back to pillar: English Pronouns (Pillar)

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