Neopronouns in English: Complete Guide to They/Them, Ze/Zir, Xe/Xem

The first time a student asked me to use “ze” pronouns, I didn’t hesitate — but I did ask for a moment to understand the pattern. I’d been teaching pronouns for years and had never had to think about how a pronoun system worked. That was the wake-up call. Neopronouns aren’t new inventions dreamed up yesterday. They’re thoughtful, intentional alternatives that people use to express their gender identity when traditional pronouns don’t fit. Once you understand the logic behind them, you can use them with confidence.

You’ll breaks down what neopronouns are, why they exist, how the most common ones are used in sentences, and how to respectfully incorporate them into your writing. If you’re an educator, editor, or simply someone who wants to get pronouns right, this is for you.

What Are Neopronouns?

Definition: Neopronouns are gender-neutral or non-binary pronouns that exist outside the traditional he/him/she/her/they/them system. They are used by people whose gender identity is not adequately described by traditional pronouns.

The word “neo” means new, but neopronouns aren’t brand new — attempts to create gender-neutral pronouns go back to the 1800s. What’s new is the growing acceptance and use of them in formal and informal contexts.

Neopronouns serve the same grammatical function as traditional pronouns: they replace nouns, avoid repetition, and make sentences clearer. The difference is that they allow people to express gender identities that fall outside the binary.

A Brief History of Gender-Neutral Pronouns

The push for gender-neutral pronouns is not recent. Here’s the timeline:

• 1850s: The pronoun “thon” (combining “that” and “one”) was proposed as a gender-neutral option but never gained traction.
• 1890s–1920s: Additional proposals included “hir,” “ve,” “per,” and “nis,” but none became widely adopted in English.
• 1970s–1980s: The feminist movement revived the push for gender-neutral language. Pronouns like “ze” and “hir” re-emerged in activist and academic spaces.
• 1990s–2000s: The internet allowed neopronoun users to organize and share their preferred pronouns more easily. Online communities began standardizing how different neopronouns are conjugated.
• 2010s–present: Major dictionaries (Oxford, Merriam-Webster) added singular “they” as a word of the year (2019). Educational institutions began adding pronoun fields to registration systems. Corporate style guides now include guidance on neopronouns.

Today, neopronouns are recognized in academic writing, student handbooks, and some corporate policies. They’re still not universally accepted, but their legitimacy as grammatical tools is growing.

Why People Use Neopronouns

People use neopronouns for a variety of reasons:

1. Gender identity expression: For some people, he or she feels limiting or inaccurate. Neopronouns allow them to express a gender identity that’s neither masculine nor feminine exclusively.
2. Avoiding misgendering: Someone might feel misgendered by “they/them” (which can feel impersonal to some) and prefer a more specific pronoun like “ze” or “xe”.
3. Cultural or spiritual reasons: Some cultures or communities have their own gender systems that don’t map onto English binary pronouns.
4. Neurodivergence and special interests: Some people, particularly those who are neurodivergent, choose neopronouns as part of their identity expression or personal language preferences.

The key point: neopronouns aren’t a phase or joke. For the people who use them, they’re a genuine and important part of their identity.

The Most Common Neopronouns

They/Them (Singular “They”)

This is the most widely recognized and accepted neopronoun. Unlike “traditional” they/them (which refers to plural nouns), singular “they” is used for one person. Major dictionaries now include singular “they,” and it’s the standard recommendation in modern style guides like AP, Chicago, and APA.

Paradigm table:

Form	Singular “They”	Example
Subject	they	They submitted their application.
Object	them	I spoke with them yesterday.
Possessive adjective	their	Their office is on the third floor.
Possessive pronoun	theirs	This notebook is theirs.
Reflexive	themself	They bought themself a coffee. (or “themselves” in informal usage)

Example sentences:

• Amara uses they/them pronouns. They love painting and spend their weekends in the studio.
• The doctor in the waiting room is ready for you. They will see you now.
• My friend told me about their new job. I’m so proud of them.

Ze/Zir (or Ze/Hir)

This is one of the oldest proposed neopronouns, gaining popularity in queer and academic spaces from the 1970s onward. “Ze” is pronounced like the letter “Z.” Some people use “hir” as the object form instead of “zir,” but “zir” is more common in contemporary usage.

Paradigm table:

Form	Ze/Zir	Example
Subject	ze	Ze is a talented musician.
Object	zir	I spoke with zir at the conference.
Possessive adjective	zir	Zir ideas are brilliant.
Possessive pronoun	zirs	This project is zirs.
Reflexive	zirself	Ze enjoyed zirself at the party.

Example sentences:

• Ze made zir presentation yesterday, and everyone was impressed with zir work.
• I gave the assignment to zir, and ze completed it on time.
• Zir ideas for the project are zirs to share with the team.

Xe/Xem

This neopronoun uses “x” (pronounced like the “z” in “xeriscape” or the “sh” in “xenophobic” — varies by speaker). It’s less common than they/them or ze/zir but is still used in some communities.

Paradigm table:

Form	Xe/Xem	Example
Subject	xe	Xe is coming to the event.
Object	xem	I invited xem to the party.
Possessive adjective	xyr (or xe’s)	Xyr talent is undeniable.
Possessive pronoun	xyrs	This success is xyrs.
Reflexive	xemself	Xe taught xemself to code.

Example sentences:

• Xe wrote a beautiful essay, and xyr teacher gave xem an excellent grade.
• I asked xem about xyr research, and xe explained xyrs methodology.
• Xe prides xemself on xyr attention to detail.

Ey/Em

Pronounced to rhyme with “they,” this is a shorter, less elaborate option that some people prefer.

Quick reference:

Form	Ey/Em
Subject	ey
Object	em
Possessive	eir
Possessive pronoun	eirs
Reflexive	emself

Example: Ey is an amazing chef. I ate at eir restaurant, and the food was eirs to be proud of.

How to Use Neopronouns in Sentences

Neopronouns follow the exact same grammatical rules as traditional pronouns. Here’s a comparison:

Grammar Function	He/Him	They/Them	Ze/Zir	Xe/Xem
Subject (before verb)	He is here.	They are here.	Ze is here.	Xe is here.
Object (after verb/preposition)	I saw him.	I saw them.	I saw zir.	I saw xem.
Possessive adjective (before noun)	His book	Their book	Zir book	Xyr book
Possessive pronoun (standalone)	The book is his.	The book is theirs.	The book is zirs.	The book is xyrs.
Reflexive (action bounces back)	He taught himself.	They taught themself.	Ze taught zirself.	Xe taught xemself.

The pattern is consistent: use them the same way you’d use any other pronoun in the sentence.

Common Mistakes and How to Avoid Them

✗ Mistake: “I will speak with ze about the project tomorrow.” (alternating between ze and he)

✓ Correct: “I will speak with ze about the project tomorrow. Ze has great ideas.” (consistent use of ze throughout)

Why: Once someone tells you their pronouns, use them consistently. Switching back and forth (or falling back to he/she) is disrespectful and confusing.

✗ Mistake: “Xem is very creative.” (using object pronoun as subject)

✓ Correct: “Xe is very creative.” (using subject pronoun as subject)

Why: Neopronouns follow the same rules as traditional pronouns. Xe is the subject form; xem is the object form.

✗ Mistake: “I don’t know how to pronounce zir pronoun, so I’ll just use ‘they’ instead.” (avoiding asking)

✓ Correct: “I’m not sure how to pronounce your pronouns. Can you help me?” (asking directly)

Why: If you don’t know, ask. Most people appreciate the effort and will be happy to explain.

✗ Mistake: Using neopronouns in a mocking tone or putting them in quotation marks (“she uses those crazy ‘ze’ pronouns”)

✓ Correct: Treating neopronouns the same way you treat any other pronouns — as a normal part of someone’s identity.

Why: Quotation marks, sarcasm, or mockery send a clear message that you don’t respect the person’s identity. Use their pronouns straightforwardly and seriously.

Neopronouns in Different Contexts

In Academic Writing

Modern style guides increasingly allow and recommend using someone’s stated pronouns, including neopronouns. If you’re writing an essay or research paper about or for someone using neopronouns, use their pronouns consistently and naturally in your text.

Example: “In zir groundbreaking research, ze demonstrated that ze/zir approach to the problem was more efficient than traditional methods.”

In Casual Conversation

The same rules apply. If someone tells you their pronouns, use them in conversation just as you would anyone else’s.

Example dialogue:

“Hey, this is my friend Morgan.”
“Nice to meet you! What pronouns do you use?”
“Ze/zir pronouns.”
“Great, thanks for telling me. Ze has a really interesting art project ze’s been working on, right?”

In Professional Settings

More workplaces are adding pronoun fields to email signatures and employee directories. Using someone’s correct pronouns in the workplace is both respectful and professional. It shows you’re paying attention and care about inclusivity.

Example email signature:

Alex Chen
Senior Designer
Pronouns: xe/xem
acchen@company.com

Sample Dialogues

Related Articles

• Singular They/Them Pronouns: History and Usage
• Non-Binary Pronouns: A Complete Guide
• Personal Pronouns in English: Full Paradigm
• Pronoun-Antecedent Agreement Rules
• ↑ Back to pillar: English Pronouns (Pillar)

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