In recent years, there has been a growing awareness and acceptance of gender diversity, which has led to changes in the way we use pronouns. “They” is now recognized as a singular pronoun that can be used to refer to someone who identifies as non-binary or gender non-conforming.
In this article, we will explore the use of they/them pronouns in English grammar. We will discuss what a pronoun is, why gendered pronouns can be limiting, and how singular they has become an important tool for inclusivity and respect. We will also provide examples of how to use they/them pronouns correctly in sentences, and give tips on how to ask someone for their preferred pronouns.
Whether you are a language learner, a writer, or simply someone who wants to be more inclusive and respectful of others, this article will provide you with the knowledge and tools you need to use they/them pronouns with confidence and clarity. So, let’s dive in and explore this fascinating topic together!
They/Them Pronouns
Understanding Pronouns
Definition of Pronouns
Pronouns are words that are used to replace nouns or noun phrases. They are used to avoid repetition and make sentences less awkward. Pronouns can refer to people, places, things, or ideas. They can also be used to show possession. In English, there are several types of pronouns, including personal pronouns, reflexive pronouns, demonstrative pronouns, possessive pronouns, and relative pronouns.
Types of Pronouns
- Personal pronouns: used to refer to people or things. They can be singular or plural, and they can be used as subjects or objects in sentences. The most common personal pronouns are:
| Subject Pronouns | Object Pronouns |
|---|---|
| I | me |
| you | you |
| he | him |
| she | her |
| it | it |
| we | us |
| they | them |
- Reflexive pronouns: used to refer back to the subject of the sentence. They end in -self or -selves. The most common reflexive pronouns are:
| Singular | Plural |
|---|---|
| myself | ourselves |
| yourself | yourselves |
| himself | themselves |
| herself | |
| itself |
- Demonstrative pronouns: used to point to specific people, places, or things. They include this, that, these, and those.
- Possessive pronouns: used to show ownership. They include mine, yours, his, hers, its, ours, and theirs.
- Relative pronouns: used to connect clauses in a sentence. They include who, whom, whose, which, and that.
They/Them as Gender Neutral Pronouns
If you’ve been paying attention to the world of gender identity and expression, you may have heard about the use of “they/them” as gender-neutral pronouns. In this section, we’ll explore the history of these pronouns and their usage in modern English.
History of They/Them
The use of “they” as a singular pronoun is not a new phenomenon. In fact, it has been in use for centuries. The Oxford English Dictionary cites examples of the singular “they” dating back to the 14th century. However, it wasn’t until the 19th century that the use of “they” as a gender-neutral pronoun began to gain traction.
As the women’s rights movement grew, there was a need for a pronoun that could refer to a person without specifying their gender. “They” was a natural choice, as it was already in use as a singular pronoun. Over time, other gender-neutral pronouns such as “ze” and “hir” were also developed, but “they/them” remains the most widely used.
Usage in Modern English
Today, the use of “they/them” as a gender-neutral pronoun is becoming increasingly common. It is used to refer to people who identify as non-binary, genderqueer, or gender non-conforming, as well as those who simply prefer not to be identified by a gendered pronoun.
Using “they/them” as a singular pronoun may feel awkward at first, especially if you’re used to thinking of it as a plural pronoun. However, it is grammatically correct and widely accepted in modern English.
Here are a few examples of how “they/them” can be used as a gender-neutral pronoun:
- “Have you seen my friend? They were supposed to meet me here.”
- “My coworker just got a promotion. They must be thrilled.”
- “I’m meeting with my doctor today. I hope they can help me.”
It’s important to remember that using someone’s preferred pronouns is a matter of respect and basic human decency. If someone tells you that they use “they/them” pronouns, it’s important to honor that and use those pronouns when referring to them.
In conclusion, the use of “they/them” as a gender-neutral pronoun is a natural evolution of the English language. While it may take some getting used to, it is an important step towards greater inclusivity and respect for all individuals, regardless of their gender identity.
Importance of Using Correct Pronouns
Using correct pronouns is an important aspect of respecting individual identity and promoting inclusive language. Pronouns are a way to refer to someone without using their name, and using the wrong pronouns can be hurtful and disrespectful.
Respecting Individual Identity
Using someone’s correct pronouns is a way to show respect for their identity. It’s important to ask someone what pronouns they use and to use them consistently. For example, if someone uses they/them pronouns, you might say, “They are going to the store” instead of “He is going to the store.” By using the correct pronouns, you are acknowledging and validating their gender identity.
It’s also important to note that not everyone identifies as male or female, and some people may use non-binary pronouns like they/them or ze/hir. By using these pronouns, you are recognizing and respecting their gender identity and helping to create a more inclusive environment.
Promoting Inclusive Language
Using correct pronouns also promotes inclusive language. When you use someone’s correct pronouns, you are showing that you value and respect all genders. This can help to create a more welcoming and accepting environment for everyone.
In addition, using correct pronouns can help to reduce gender-based assumptions and stereotypes. For example, if someone uses they/them pronouns, you might not assume that they are male or female based on their appearance or behavior. This can help to break down gender norms and promote a more diverse and accepting society.
In conclusion, using correct pronouns is an important way to respect individual identity and promote inclusive language. By asking someone what pronouns they use and using them consistently, you can help to create a more welcoming and accepting environment for everyone.
Common Misconceptions About They/Them Pronouns
There are many misconceptions surrounding the use of they/them pronouns, especially when it comes to grammar. In this section, we’ll address some of the most common concerns and clarify why they are not valid.
Grammatical Concerns
One of the most common misconceptions about they/them pronouns is that they are grammatically incorrect when used in the singular form. However, this is simply not true. In fact, they/them pronouns have been used in the singular form in the English language for centuries, dating back to the 14th century.
Here are a few examples of how they/them pronouns can be used in the singular form:
- “Someone left their jacket on the chair. I wonder if they’ll come back for it.”
- “If a student needs help, they should ask their teacher for assistance.”
As you can see, using they/them pronouns in the singular form is not only grammatically correct, but it is also inclusive and respectful of individuals who identify as non-binary or gender non-conforming.
Singular vs. Plural Usage
Another misconception surrounding they/them pronouns is that they are only used in the plural form. While it is true that they/them pronouns are often used to refer to multiple people, they can also be used to refer to a single person.
For example:
- “Did you see that person over there? They were wearing a red hat.”
- “My friend came out as non-binary, and they now use they/them pronouns.”
In both of these examples, they/them pronouns are used to refer to a single person, not a group of people.
It’s important to remember that language is constantly evolving, and the use of they/them pronouns in the singular form is becoming more and more common. By using they/them pronouns in a respectful and inclusive way, we can create a more welcoming and accepting environment for all individuals, regardless of their gender identity.
How to Use They/Them Pronouns Properly
When it comes to using they/them pronouns, it’s important to remember that these pronouns are not just reserved for non-binary individuals. Anyone can use they/them as their preferred pronouns, and it’s important to respect their choice.
In Conversation
Using they/them pronouns in conversation can take some getting used to, but it’s important to make an effort to use the correct pronouns for the person you are speaking with. Here are some tips for using they/them pronouns in conversation:
- Listen carefully to how the person introduces themselves and what pronouns they use.
- If you are unsure about someone’s pronouns, it’s okay to politely ask them what pronouns they prefer.
- If you make a mistake and use the wrong pronouns, apologize and correct yourself. Don’t make a big deal out of it, just correct yourself and move on.
- Avoid using gendered language when referring to someone who uses they/them pronouns. Instead of saying “he” or “she,” use gender-neutral language like “they” or “them.”
In Writing
Using they/them pronouns in writing can be a bit trickier, but there are some simple rules to follow to ensure you are using them properly. Here are some tips for using they/them pronouns in writing:
- Use they/them pronouns in place of gendered pronouns like “he” or “she.”
- Make sure the pronouns agree with the noun they are replacing. For example, if you are referring to a group of people, use “they” instead of “he” or “she.”
- Use gender-neutral language whenever possible. For example, instead of saying “fireman,” say “firefighter.”
- If you are unsure about someone’s pronouns, it’s okay to use their name instead of a pronoun.
Using they/them pronouns may take some practice, but it’s an important step in creating a more inclusive and respectful society. Remember to listen to the person’s preference, apologize if you make a mistake, and use gender-neutral language whenever possible.
Conclusion
In conclusion, using they/them pronouns is an important aspect of inclusive language. It allows individuals to express their gender identity and feel respected and acknowledged. Here are some key takeaways from this article:
- They/them pronouns are a valid and grammatically correct way to refer to someone who identifies as non-binary, genderqueer, or gender-nonconforming.
- Using someone’s correct pronouns is a basic form of respect and can have a significant impact on their mental health and well-being.
- It is important to ask for and use someone’s correct pronouns, rather than assuming based on their appearance or name.
- It is also important to practice using gender-neutral language in general, such as “partner” instead of “boyfriend” or “girlfriend.”
Remember that using they/them pronouns is not a political statement or a trend. It is simply a way to respect and include all individuals, regardless of their gender identity. By making an effort to use inclusive language, we can create a more welcoming and accepting world for everyone.
Frequently Asked Questions
What are gender-neutral pronouns?
Gender-neutral pronouns are pronouns that do not associate with any specific gender. They are used to refer to individuals who do not identify as male or female, or when the gender of a person is unknown. Some common gender-neutral pronouns include they/them/theirs, ze/hir/hirs, and xe/xem/xyrs.
Can they/them pronouns be used for a singular person?
Yes, they/them pronouns can be used for a singular person. In English, we already use singular “they” all the time when the gender of a person is unknown. For example, “Someone left their keys on the table.” Using they/them pronouns for a singular person is becoming more common and is widely accepted in the LGBTQ+ community.
What is the meaning of they/them pronouns in the LGBTQ+ community?
In the LGBTQ+ community, they/them pronouns are often used by individuals who identify as non-binary, genderqueer, or gender non-conforming. Using they/them pronouns allows individuals to express their gender identity and feel seen and respected.
What are some examples of using they/them pronouns?
Here are some examples of using they/them pronouns in sentences:
- “They are going to the store.”
- “I met them at the park.”
- “Their favorite color is blue.”
- “I don’t know where they went.”
How do I use they/them pronouns in English grammar?
When using they/them pronouns, it is important to use them in the same way you would use any other pronoun. For example, instead of saying “he went to the store,” you would say “they went to the store.” It is also important to use they/them pronouns consistently and respectfully.
Is it grammatically correct to use they/them pronouns as a singular pronoun in English?
Yes, using they/them pronouns as a singular pronoun is grammatically correct in English. In fact, the use of singular they has been used in English for centuries. The American Dialect Society even named “they” as the word of the year in 2015, recognizing its growing use as a gender-neutral pronoun.
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